Saturday Night Fever – A LAN Party Story.

I spent my Friday night reinstalling an OS for a long time client of mine, Laura. She’s a 40-something hottie MILF with a nice body and great hair (GREAT HAIR!!! This is why I’m still single). When the SP2 update started downloading, I called it a night. Come Saturday morning, I stopped over at her place and the damn thing didn’t even start downloading! It was sitting at 0%. I should’ve checked twice before I left her place. Anyway, I restarted the Windows Update and it started properly. What a crap load. When it finishes installing, I invoked the installer and left it until noon. So, I went downtown and made a beeline for RadioShack. Dennis, Lancer, and Graham Cracker was working.

So, Dennis and James G have been wanting to plan a LAN party for a long time, and I was informed that it would be ideal to do it later on that night, since the girls were all going out. Of course, I obliged.

The complications: Eugene went out of town. Since the delivery driver for the WP takes Saturday off, we had no delivery driver. What this means is that I have to deliver. I just found out that Patrick’s pre-wedding social was that night. Which means that I would have to go (but I don’t drink, get that).

The solutions: I called Patrick up, and he didn’t even bother to invite me because he knew it wasn’t my thing. He knows me so well. Yeah, I was screwed with the WP, though. However, I just told Dad that I could deliver until 18:30. He was fine with that.

So, I went back to Laura’s and finished the installation. I went back home and started working on a laptop for a guy I’ve known since high school. Acquaintance, not friend. I got parts in on Friday, so I tried them out today and the damn thing has a system password on it. Because it’s Dell, there’s no software method to circumvent it, and I can’t just flip a pin on the mobo to reset CMOS. So, I took the whole freaking thing apart to see if I could prove myself wrong. Yeah, that didn’t work. What a waste of an afternoon.

I did some deliveries until 18:30, then came home and brought my PC to James G’s place. What happened next was so funny, I must tell a tale. But in order to tell the tale, I must travel back in time to when I working at RadioShack, not even a few months ago.

There was a lady who studied in China. She thought she’d be cool and marry this Chinese dude. She came over to Canada so she could use her skills for school administration. She wanted to buy a laptop, so she came to RadioShack. Of course, she sought out the protagonist of this story. After a few ups and downs (she was quite the hard sell!), she finally chose her laptop. Now, her Chinese husband wasn’t so bright. He didn’t know how things worked, so he asked questions whenever he was in the store, and it became a hindrance to our hero. His terrible Mandarin accent echoed and vacant stare glazed over as he always said the words, “Yes, I understand that,” even though it was quite apparent that he didn’t. He became the running gag among the hero and his friends. Fast forward to last night. Said hero and friends were having ye olde LAN party when it struck them – “We are famished! We must go out and feast!” So out they traversed through the bitter colds into the depths of the downtown until they came across “KFC”. The mighty hero and his friends walked into KFC and laid down their coin, saying, “Give us a meal fit for kings!” “We have chicken,” the cashier said. Anyway, the hero and his friends sat and waited patiently, until the aforementioned Chinese moron walks up to them (apparently, the dunce delivers ye olde KFC). The Chinese moron asks, “You no work at RadioShack anymore?” To which the hero replies, “No, I haven’t worked there since August.” Chinese moron continues, “I hear you work at City of Thompson. Somebody telled me he saw you there.” “No,” the hero responded. “You are mistaken. I do not work at the City.” “But,” the Chinese moron insisted. “Somebody telled me he saw you working at City of Thompson.” “No, I don’t,” the hero said with a glint in his eye towards James G. “I am actually homeless now.” “Really?” The dunce wondered. “Yes.” “Somebody came to install my MTS high speed last week.” “Is that so?” “Yes, they came and installed my MTS high speed last week.” Obviously, he could not comprehend the notion of being homeless, so he changed the subject. An oft favorite pastime of his. “So you still fixing computers?” The Chinese moron asked. “No, I have been homeless since August. I have not used the internet since that time. I actually live in a box on the mean streets, trying to find food and warmth when I can,” the hero continued his fable. “That’s good,” the Chinese moron said. Meanwhile, the friends were bubbling on the edge of laughter, but held it in for fear of spoiling the tale. “Speaking of which,” the hero said, turning to one of the friends. “I’m staying over at your place tonight.” In due time, the chicken arrived, and they bid their farewells to the dunce, where they exploded in laughter on the way to their noble steeds. The End.

The moral of this story? There are Chinese idiots in this world too.

Anyway, after we got back to James G’s place, we played a couple games of C&C Generals. Man, I hadn’t played the game in ages, so I got killed early on in each game. So, since I was bored, I thought it would be a good idea to subscribe to a month of WoW, just to show James G the game. We mostly hung out and showed each other the funny stuff we found on the Net. It was cool. I haven’t hung out with the guys like that in a while. Hahaha, I was there until 4:00!! Man, I woke up not too long ago. It makes no sense why I stayed up so late and was well rested after only 5 hours of sleep. Esmond, however, needed 10 hours of sleep. Go figure.

Got to get a shower and go see if James G is up at around 15:00 to 16:00. He still has my network cable. I also have to make a beeline over to James H’s place to find out the whole story about how he got laid off from work on Friday.

Current Music: Hamasaki Ayumi – my name’s WOMEN