The Meaning Of My Life?

Nothing much happening. Saw a couple movies yesterday. View From The Top and Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle. I found the new Charlie’s Angels to be very cheesy, very silly, and very fun. It’s a movie that you shouldn’t take seriously at all. It’s also very fan-servicey and has tons of cosplay for a movie made in America. Obviously a lot of Japanese influence here. The Gwyneth Paltrow movie, however, was what surprised me. It was a very good movie with a good message – you can live your dreams if you work hard enough, but your dreams can also change if you’ve had them all along. Since I don’t have anybody special, I’m still going to aim for my dreams.

It brought me to some dangerous thinking. I hate it when I do that. Anyway, I kept wondering to myself – why am I working in a dead-end job getting experience for something I don’t really want to do for the rest of my life, anyway? I mean, RadioShack is great, and I love the work. I get exercise, gadgets, and responsibility. However, the restaurant is merely a glancing settlement. If my parents pass away, my brothers and I inherit the entire business and its assets. Since that may not come until I’m retired, it seems a moot issue. The extra two hours I spend a day at the restaurant could be better spent doing other things. It’s been a while since I’ve drawn, and I REALLY need to develop that skill. And when was the last time I studied my Japanese? Too long. When I look at my life in the past year, nothing was accomplished. I got lazy. I got disillusioned. I got sidetracked. Sure, I made money and I finally paid off a bill. It’s time for me to assess my life and find out how I can change it.

First of all, RadioShack. I love the job, and I love the work, but underneath it all, I’m really just in love with the people I work with. Lee, Dennis, John, Cam, and Chad – they’ve been fun to work with. Where else can you have fun and be competitive at the same time? When I worked at NorthStar, it was all work and no play until I took matters into my own hands and slacked ’til I got fired. Speaking of which, my old boss from NorthStar, Ken Collin, passed away last week. I can’t say I’m glad – even though he was a ruthless boss, I think he was a good person, just very overworked. Reminds me of my dad. Anyway, back to the matter at hand, I have job security. Even though we run in different cliques outside of work – they party at night in bars while I hang out at night on the wired – I love working with my co-workers, and I depend on their opinion of me to stay at my job. In the end, I don’t want to leave because I love the people. I guess the reason why I don’t want to work at INCO is because it’s filled with the kind of people I dislike – cranky, lazy, old-fashioned, and greedy. I think that if I were to choose another job, I’d love to work in a large computer corporation, programming in a comfortable, well-lit cubicle with friendly geeks surrounding me and sending me fun e-mails of programs that parody our work. Ever see Antitrust? It’s mostly true. The only thing keeping me back from leaving RadioShack are the people. The way I am, when it comes down to the final choice, I would leave all that in an instant. But can I?

Secondly, the restaurant. Blah, don’t even get me started. I hate working with my family, and I hate working at that dead-end job. I hear nothing but complaints from both customers and my parents. Customers about why our food takes so long, and parents about why I’m not working so hard. Take my advice – starting a business? Don’t let your family get involved, no matter what. When it comes to family, you’re always critical of their actions and you expect them to work harder than anybody else. It doesn’t help that you see them all the time at home too. I hate that job, and if it wasn’t for the fact that we already wasted (I mean, invested ^_^) 9 years of our lives into that greasy place, I’d burn it down in an instant. In fact, I would burn down every Chinese restaurant in the world just to ensure that I never ever work at one again. EVER.

Thirdly, my computer. Hahaha. My one, true companion, who has stuck with me through thick and thin, and has been my babysitter when I was growing up, my best friend in high school, and finally my life partner now, has been my setback. The computer is like good and evil – it’s both a tool and a toy. Use it like either, but get too engrossed in one and not the other, and you’re diagnosed with computer addiction syndrome. The computer is both my friend and enemy. Because the computer is so multifunctional, it can be used to accomplish work faster than manual labor. I can pump out anime cels on computer faster, more efficiently, and more accurately than by hand. However, with evil things called “computer games”, “surfing the internet”, “forums”, and “online chat”, you can easily waste time on a computer when you should be doing work. Mind you, entertainment is the norm as well – downloading anime and music – has been a great asset. I had to cut back on my downloading, though, but it still takes more time than I’m comfortable with. Organizing this stuff also takes up my time, and it comprises of the main things I do too. See? I just wasted tons of time writing a massive LJ entry about time well wasted. Is that not the pinnacle of wasting time?

I can’t say that I’m not gonna cut back on a lot of these three things, because I am so inconsistent with my life. My mood changes from hour to hour, and I’m mostly just ranting. But, one thing is for sure – I’m lazy, and I need to get off my butt and do what I need to do to get where I want to be within the given amount of time. Screw Japan, Winnipeg, the States, Thompson, whatever. I want to be in the position to be able to do what I want, and do it great. I want bragging rights, and I want to be ready to make that big jump from RadioShack Sales Associate, Wonton Place kitchen helper, or computer addict to what I want to be – animator or manga-ka. So, what is my goal? To improve my skills. Holy crap, that could have been said in one short paragraph! >_< Current Anime: Kimi Ga Nozomu Eien - 06 [Lunar]